Temerity Notes

Observations from a fellow traveler

Photo by Nicole Baster on Unsplash

I still have lots of questions and am still becoming…and have the temerity to show up un-done and unfinished.

Reverence

As I turn the word over in my mind

It has the feel of a large, smooth stone

passing back and forth across my palms.

.

And I can feel it in the space between us, that some of you might be thinking,

“Warning, warning, church language.”

You may be thinking that that’s the language of hierarchies and imposed distance.

And you’re not wrong.

But what is becoming clear to me in my own unfolding

Is that words and their meanings

can be inherited as is,

And we can choose to renovate them

just like houses,

and then to live in them differently.

Reverence is one of those words. It’s different than respect.

Respect is transactional and something we earn,

based on another’s willingness to see us

as fully human and worthy.

It looks like “you do this thing, exactly how I think it should be done

and I’ll honor you.”

But Reverence is something else entirely.

It’s our willingness to bow in recognition of something’s sacredness

without needing it to prove itself first.

Trust me, I won’t get in trouble for using it…

And you won’t be in trouble for reading this.

When my first child was born 36 years ago,

I held this small, magical creature,

and something cracked open in me.

I wasn’t consciously thinking.

I was just seeing the mystery of him.

The way his fingernails were perfect.

The way he seemed to be both a beginning and an infinity.

That feeling was Reverence.

We decide what we hold in our lives as sacred,

and with reverence.

Through both my everyday interactions and the beautiful messages

I receive as whispers on the wind,

I’m remembering what was stolen from us.

What might our lives, families, communities, and the world look like if we remembered our access to reverence?

For centuries, reverence was intentionally pointed away from the body, away from the female, away from the earth.

"Reverence”, like temerity, arrived on a whisper, with this admonishment:

You are not a pressed flower in a book

Flat and dry

as a photograph.

None of you are.

You are alive

Your work is alive

Vibrant and plush.

I’ll admit I smiled at that.

I’m plush

With that beautiful validation, I’m proud to continue these weekly Temerity Notes as a place to highlight the authentic and vibrant responses shared by those walking this path.

“I’m in a season of both reflection and creation, and it’s reminding me that becoming is a series of thresholds. Some of them we chose, and some were thrust upon us. The ones that are exciting me now are the ones we cross willingly, and they’re even more delicious after resisting them until life gently nudges us forward.”

And yes to Temerity! TEMERITY! 🔥”

“Thank you dear crone 💖”

“Kyra, I’m enjoying your writing immensely today. There is such deep truth in this piece. “May we be the kind of presence that doesn’t manage other women into silence, but helps create conditions where everyone can thrive in their own strange and beautiful way.” What a beautiful invocation.”

“One thing that I have always thought about is the idea that some people think that to be successful, women need to think more like men (who happen to be “successful” through no extra work of their own)…but I’m not trying to think or be like a man. I’m trying to be more of the ME that I am. My success shouldn’t depend on being more like someone ELSE.”

“1 word……..POWERFUL…….I STAND WITH YOU🥰”

“Love this, Kyra. I’m embarrassed but I actually had to ask Alexa what temerity meant (before I read your great examples). It’s a perfect word for we readers who are in our 60s to 90’s in today’s world.”

“You have nailed Aunt Lydia. when I first read it in the 80s, The Handmaids Tale made a life long impression on me. her card deactivated and access to her own money was taken away — Written before debit cards existed — unless she had a husband. Scared the c**p out of me! And watching other women be complicit in the torture and oppression?! Made me sick”

“I LOVED this piece. The line about women finding one another really stayed with me. One thing I’ve noticed, both personally and professionally, is that so many women are building full, meaningful lives. They’re developing careers, friendships, hobbies, purpose, and a stronger sense of who they are. I sometimes wonder if that’s part of why so many women are no longer willing to shrink themselves or settle for relationships that don’t align with the life they’ve worked hard to create. Thank you for writing this. It resonated deeply.”

“I’m happy to be here. I already feel so supported 💕”

“Beautiful article, and I love your very relatable examples. I had forgotten about Aunt Lydia. And, when you said “Let them BE” I smiled, because one great lesson I’ve learned from Mel Robbins is simply, “Let them.” It assumes Be, and it assumes Be themselves or do or think what they want. Because, in actuality, we cannot change anyone but ourselves. Well done,💙”

“I thoroughly enjoyed your analysis. You see the Golden Cage effect a lot in American law, such as the Patriot Act. People are willing to give up their freedom for the illusion of safety.”

“Not only you. This is so true. And what you come to realise is that village you had a year ago, isn’t always the village you need now. And it’s okay to change certain people in your village in introduce new ones. It’s even healthier.”

“Thank you for reading and validating us out here💚!”

“Today, after reading this, it deeply resonated, I asked my heart if there was anything that wanted to come home. What I was shown was power. Sovereignty. Freedom.A deeper anchoring of all three into my root chakra and into my everyday lived experience. I find it fascinating how life speaks to us. Through dreams. Through our bodies. Through conversations. Through quiet moments of knowing that arrive without explanation. This week, I am deeply listening. 💜”

“Kyra. I came across this by accident today. This 75 year old women feels blessed and hopeful for the future of women and full and complete human beings without apologies. Just keep on keeping on.”

“Yes! The conversations are happening so much more these days, times of great change are upon us. I am so happy to be a conscious participant in it. 💜”

“You built words that welcomed in the people you wanted and should have stopped those you didn’t. In my mind, we are not here to build an audience, we’re here to build community. You seem awesome.”

“Thank you so much. Looking back, I can honestly say that every part of this awakening and spiritual journey has brought me closer to myself and its been totally worth it. I am incredibly grateful for it all and for beautiful souls like you who are walking their own path and sharing it so openly. 💜”

“I’m practicing my big girl voice to call in my tribe. We’re all looking for people who can understand and speak our emotional language”

“I love that you give yourself what you need! Therapy was in my tool box as well🌸✨”

“Men who feel compelled to correct an attempt to build a space for women are why we need spaces for women. Also, what must it be like to feel so entitled that you can comment on something not meant for you and not within your realm of experience? “

“Having never done something exactly like this, originally I tried to guide myself instead of letting myself just be, I found something in me was disagreeing with my thinking … it was odd, but powerful. My logical pieces were overridden - I had thought at 65 years old, I must be in Autumn - but the other part that was interrupting, was telling me I’m in Spring. Wow, ready to create, blossom, … . I like this idea.”

“Somehow, I stumbled upon your post, and it deeply resonates with my 62-year-old self. I’m taking small steps to rediscover what truly brings me joy and making time to get back to writing, moving towards the life that is calling to me.🩷🙏🏾”

“Absolutely! We aare the ones, and now is the time. We’re each called in our unique way, but make no mistake, we are being called.🪶.”

“The simple ‘We are not alone…’ does all the work here and makes every one of who know, see one another. Thank you”

“Thank you Soooo much for this Kyra!! 💚🙏🏾 This quote especially stood out for me!

“We are not an army; we are something ancient and far more nourishing and potent than that. We are an ecosystem. Each of us carries unique medicine that helps the whole thrive. We ARE ancient and it’s time to nourish OURSELVES and each other (women)!! Bring in the Crones!! 😎💚🙌🏾💐👑🙋🏾‍♀️✨🌌🌕”

Our intentions and words carry energy.

Let’s stop doing the heavy lifting for the bad guys and instead turn our attention towards life-affirming and community-building with people doing the work of healing, themselves and society.

A special message for anyone new here and holding a story close to your heart.

My work and writing won’t resonate with everyone, nor will yours.

That’s okay, write anyway.

Kyra🪶

Writer | Way-Shower | Sacred Space Holder

Guiding women through the thresholds between who they’ve been and who they’re becoming.